I decided tonight I will be heading back home to Shadly and Yoru, cutting my hometown “vacation” a day short. It’s been great seeing my pops, but to be honest, the trip has left me a little saddened.
Generally, I’m not the type that can get a hold of people to make plans, but when I visit my hometown I can’t help but miss my friends from high school, so I give it my all to try and make plans. Sadly, this trip everyone has been preoccupied with their significant others.
Of course I am overjoyed my friends have found love and happiness, but I can’t help but feel hurt by the constant cold shoulders. Generally Shad comes home with me and I hang around his goofy friends to occupy my time. But this visit he had to stay behind for work, leaving me to entertain myself; which I have failed miserably.
Shad and I started dating my Junior year of high school. Starting a real relationship, learning more about myself, figuring out what I wanted in life, I admit; I ditched out on a lot of things with my friends as well. I learned there was more to just getting drunk on the weekends, and I wanted my life to go in a different direction. Why spend the weekends watching my pals hook up with people they hardly know? At the end of the night I would be alone anyway, so why not just be with Shad?
Well, now I’m beginning to realize how my friends must have felt back then. Even though I can’t judge them because I did the same thing, I still can’t help but hold a little grudge. What’s an hour or two of a friends time when they have the rest of their lives to spend with their significant other?
But hurt feelings aside, I’m so glad to see my friends building their own lives. Some are married, some are engaged, and some are even experiencing their first serious relationship. I can’t get too bent up in my own hurt feelings, when I couldn’t ask for anything else for them.
It’s crazy to think some may even start having babies in the next couple of years! Where has the time gone!?
This weekend, though it’s hard to admit, I have realized we simply move on. It pains me, but also makes me happy to say that I will always have these people in my heart. Through the hard times and good moments, these people make up most of my childhood memories, and I’ll never forget them.
But even I am looking forward to the day when I possibly leave my home state behind and start a new adventure in my own life.
I’m wishing the best for everyone.