I asked my mom one time, ‘How can you be in love with someone and not want to be with them?’
To me… I don’t understand things like ‘love’. How we seem to lose all control of ourselves over some other person who will leave in the end. Because nothing lasts. Especially not romantic love. But what if you love someone and it’s not romantic at all? You just… love them. You want the best for them. And you would do absolutely anything to make them smile. When they hurt, you hurt too. And all you want is to always be beside them.
What’s that about?
My mom told me, ‘sometimes people come into your life just when you need them the most and then once they have fulfilled their purpose, it’s time for them to move on.’ It seems so cruel. Throughout life we are given these fleeting beautiful moments and once we finally think… maybe I was wrong, the rug is pulled up from beneath us. I guess that’s where art comes from. Books, pictures, words. That’s all we want is to express the beautiful pains in life. I guess in the end I just don’t see the point. I’m supposed to say… At least I was strong. At least I survived. But I wish there was more to it than that.
And even though my heart always seems to shatter more and more…